Saturday, July 06, 2019
The Tragedy Of The "Black" Male (written sometime back in 2015)
Many of you aren't going to like what I am saying here, because the White Supremacists have used centuries of propaganda to discredit the "Black" male and conditioned your minds to believe that anytime someone points out any incorrect behavior coming from the "Black" female towards him, that she's always justified in doing so, because he had to have done something to her to deserve it.
This is not to bring any disrespect to the "Black" female. The "Black" female is just as much a Victim Of Racism as the "Black" male, yet she has the advantage in that she is a female. The system teaches most females to be smarter than the "Black" male. The "Black" queen is the second most powerful piece on the chess board, behind the most powerful "White" queen. What makes the "White" woman and the "Black" female more powerful? Their use of words. The "White" woman is a master at using words.
Not to take away any focus on the "Black" female being mistreated on the basis of color, we must see the reality that we spend too much time trying to cater to the "Black" female and don't give any attention to the "Black" male, when it comes to how we ("Black" folks) treat each other.
I suspect that the Racists (White Supremacists) start mis-educating the "Black" male earlier, than they do the "Black" female.
I am a "Black" male and I need attention too. I'm tired of putting her first, when she does not put me first. We are supposed to put each other first. People are always talking about sexism, when it comes to the mistreatment of the "Black" female, but, never about the male. Many of you are going to say that I am whining and that I need "to be a man" and "step up to the plate" and stop complaining. Why does the "Black" female get to complain about what the "Black" male isn't doing, but, I can't? Is that Justice? I am surrounded by "Black" females. I've attempted marriage two times with "Black" females and I am still in the second one (at the time of this writing, I have since separated/divorced her). I have two female offspring that I've attempted to be a father to. I have my "mother" whom I believe has done the best that she could do to be a mother to me in all areas, except one. She has never crossed over the line of "sisterhood" that I've seen "Black" females have with each other when it comes to teaching a "Black" male how to deal with them, until today.
Racist Propaganda tells the "Black" male that in order to consider himself a "Man", he must do work with his hands (roughneck / thug), instead of working with his mind ( nerd/ bougie/ uppity).
After, years of watching me get mistreated by the two "Black" females mentioned above, my "mom" finally admitted to the fact that she used her mouth against my "father" the majority of their attempted marriage. They argued so much that at age 7, I swore that I'd never get married. Yeah right, I really kept that promise.
The White Supremacists have taught huge numbers of "Black" males to use violence against other "Black" people, when they can no longer use words to defend themselves.
The White Supremacists have taught huge numbers of "Black" females to use words, instead. But more and more I am seeing "Black" females get physical. I was physically abused by this last one whom I was "married" to for 15 years. She would slap me, kick me, rip my clothes, knock things from my hands, all though while I am following the programming that says "Don't hit females." She took advantage of that numerous occasions.
They all do (indirectly most of the time) whatever they can to make my existence here, miserable, all the while I've done whatever they've asked me (within my ability) to do. Whenever she needs help, everyone (including me) comes to her aid. But, most of the time everyone looks at me as though they had to do my job with helping her because I fell short. When the "Black" male needs help, most people say "He's a man, he can help himself."
Because I am seen as a so-called "Man", I am supposed to automatically know how to do everything that the "White" man has the ability to do, but not get the respect that comes with it, because I lack the Racial Classification of "White". No one trusts what I say. I am required to go through extremes to prove what I've experienced. Most situations are like I am a criminal in a court of appeal, seen as guilty, while trying to prove my innocence.
No one sees that I possess both emotion and reason. When I state to her that she's mistreating me, I am too sensitive. If I'm feeling stressed because of it, but don't want to reveal the truth to her, for fear of being accused of being too sensitive, I am accused of not revealing my feelings, which is not sensitive enough. I am viewed as someone who is violent (especially towards females), angry (especially towards females), lies, cheats, and steals to get ahead, only because other "Black" males have done this, and so any kind of business that I conduct is viewed as though it will lead to one of those things.
If I own a weapon (knife or gun), many "Black" females hint that my owning a weapon is going to lead to violence against them, even though I've never used any violence against them. My first so-called wife, actually told people that I was going to kill her, after she watched O.J. get arrested on T.V. That was crazy. I gave her no indication that I would do such a thing. She lied to people that I had been to jail, and that she had to put up her house to bail me out. She told people that I would beat her constantly. She told people that I had cheated on her. She told people that she had to support me and our offspring. They believed her, without ever knowing me. Why? Because these are things that "Black" males are perceived to be doing.
Especially in the minds of huge numbers of "Black" females, who think that a "Black" male has to be "trained"by them, in order for him to behave in a correct manner.
When I discovered that she was having sexual intercourse with other "Black" males, during our "marriage" and I told some other people about it, I was to blame for it no matter what.
Many "Black" males told me that I wasn't "hitting it right", meaning that I was not fulfilling her sexual needs.
Many "Black" females told me that I wasn't "treating her right" meaning that I was not fulfilling her emotional needs.
Some "Black" males and females that knew her, tried to help me deal with her mistreatment, without letting her know that they were.
One "Black" female actually talked to her about her incorrect behavior towards me. One! It should have been all of the "Black" females that knew what she was doing, but they remained silent.
When I was active in the Nation of Islam, we ( F.O.I.) aka "Black" males wouldn't hesitate to put pressure on other brothers (to the point of whooping their ass, when necessary) if they mistreated the (M.G.T.) aka "Black" female. Some of the M.G.T. did pressure a sister to "act right", sometimes, but, it wasn't enough, they didn't beat no ass.
Too many times I've allowed myself to be a garbage pale for the verbal and physical abuse that I've suffered from the "Black" female, and never laid one hand on her. The "Black" male holds in all of that stress with no way to release it, and it turns into disease. STRESS KILLS. And it kills "Black" males far more rapidly than it does the "Black" female. Why? she gets more help with dealing with her stress than the "Black" male does.
If the "Black" male and female get into a conflict with words? Who will win? If you said the "Black" male. Then stop reading here.
I have since been divorced from the second "marriage" which was worse than the first one. She was verbally and physically abusive waaay more than the first. Huge numbers of "Black" males go through this kind of abuse and yet remain silent because of the embarrassment factor of revealing how "they let a female dominate them". But the main problem with that is that most of us are suffering through it and the more we remain silent about it the worse it will get.
For my lack of knowing what to do, when verbally and physically abused, my only alternative was to walk away but she would follow me or block the door to where I'd be forced to listen to her abusive words and my only defense was to respond with verbal abuse as well. Throwing my hands up in frustration and feeling like I am about to explode is where it could take me so I got to the point to where I would just tune her out with the hopes that one day she'd see that we are in this war together and that its US against the system of white supremacy.
But she never did accept that idea. While in a custody dispute over my son, she attempted to get full custody by telling the court that I was crazy because I made videos on YouTube about White Supremacy. You could hear the laughter and snickering in the minds of almost everyone in the courthouse only noticeable by a smile and head shaking from the judges bench to the edges of the courtroom. Oops I digressed.
While still in the "marriage", I attempted to handle the abusive situations with compensatory conversation control, which is to not respond to statements and only ask questions. That worked briefly but the emotions were too overwhelming for me. I couldn't help but respond back with verbal abuse in my defense. I see where I made my mistakes. I have absolutely nothing against the "Black" female and everything against her behavior that is characteristically pointed out in The Black Man's Guide To Understanding The Black Woman by Sharazod Ali.
"Sometimes the Blackman grows to respond to everything she says in a harsh rebuttal tone. He becomes accustomed to the rough talk and uses it as frequently as she. This is wrong. It only convinces the Blackwoman that he can handle her so he has joined her. She will drag him under the earth if he allows it. When a Blackman falls for a Blackwoman and begins to demonstrate that he loves her more than he loves himself, she recognizes this as a ripe stage for her to really let it rip. The more he professes his love the worse she will treat him. The more he tries to give her the more she will demand." The more he tries to please her the more critical she is of his efforts."
Those words described both of my "marriages" to "Black" females and the relationships that I had with others whom I didn't get the "White" man's permission ("marriage" license) to "marry".
Growing up in the bay area (born 1968 in Oakland, raised in Richmond) during the Black Power movement and having been surrounded by people who taught me from day one to respect and protect the Black woman. Having been taught to love her and cherish her. Be nice and courteous to her with the belief that we had a war to fight with the system and not each other was a huge surprise when I met these two females who deceived me into believing that they too had grown up apart of this same movement. I no longer believe that "marriage" is possible while under the system of white supremacy. I no longer believe that there is such a thing as "Romantic love" while under the system of white supremacy. The root word to "Romance" is "Roman" which shows you were this type of belief comes from. More on that another time.
I have heard huge numbers of females say "I want a man who can handle me." What since does that make?
Are you some out of control beast? That needs to be whooped into submission? How about an independent free spirited person that needs to be abused until you submit?
Sounds like a master/ slave relationship to me.
What person in their correct mind would want to spend time trying to "handle" someone else?
What person who wants themselves and their people to be FREE wants to dominate their female companion into being "handled"?
If you THINK you need to be "handled" what does that say about your mental state?
I understand now that "handling" means to not tolerate your mistreatment but its backwards because now if you mistreat me from the start you lose because you only get that one chance. I heard Mr Fuller say that if anyone hits you, you need to get away from them, and stay away from them. I now agree with that. And so more power to those of you who have had the self respect to do the same.
I have now learned to let go of the subservient abusive sponge I allowed myself to be because I felt sympathy for the "Black" female. It's time that I feel sympathy for my self and empathize with my own consciousness and protect it at all cost from outsiders until the system of white supremacy is replaced with justice.
As much as I want to trust her, I see that I cannot.
Call me bitter because I have given far too much sweet and got bitterness in return.
LOL!! I am not bitter, I have only found self respect. But far too many who don't know the difference will call me bitter.
My self-respect has caused me to believe I must have a set of rules, regulations, limitations, and boundary lines.
A code that I must have whenever dealing with "Non-white" females in a system of white supremacy.
I think I will start by following the suggestions in the United Independent Compensatory Code in the area of sex just to see what happens.
Posted by Khalif "SynQ" Muhammad at 11:09 AM